hopeful and mad about it. 32, he/him, pittsburgh. work at google, views are my own
"oh NO" I say through a mouthful of crust, "I ate your bread and now I guess I have to stay with you under the fairy mound for eternity, damn" while the Fairies refuse to make eye contact with me
today i'm thinking i'll get incredibly mad, online, about 'pokémon', which i do believe are a species of rodent endemic to the japanese archipelago
the average human swallows 7 bowls of soup in their sleep each year
i hate to be a grammar snob, but it should actually be "Fewer Miserables"
y'all "crosspost" between mastodon and twitter, while i "crosspost" in the temple of the Lord
Warning: Module ‘automatic-breathing.ko’ has failed to load! Your vendor strongly recommends this module be loaded, and may indicate tampering with your system. Switching to manual breathing. You are now manually breathing.
us pol Show more
moderator, dying, gasping their last breath: pls someone dunk on socialism, my family needs those dunks to live
oh now i remember why i haven't listened to st vincent in such a long time — it's because i feel every single song on the album. terrible
@ryan I have one in my barn (this is not a joke)
has anyone ever seen an "auger?" im convinced someone needed a simile one day and made them up
i'm returning to the woodwork. it's where i belong
Reading is illegal and if you understand this post you’re committing a crime
ladies, it’s finally 2018 and 👏 we’re 👏 re-stigmatizing 👏 terrorism
un (c'est n'est pas une pipe)deux (c'est n'est pas une pipe)trois (c'est n'est pas une pipe)quatre (c'est n'est pas une pipe)
reblog thisif you have a bad brainthat don't think good
chrono-beagle. the dog that travels to important moments from history and shouts "baroOoOo" stamping his paws until somebody pets him.
18 inches tall and completely untethered from linear time. chrono-beagle.
teleporter annoyances being such a big part of Star Trek makes sense if you consider they're the 23rd century version of video conferencing
all podcasts are 3 people named "Jake" chanting in unison
every year i tell myself my work/life balance is less fucked and every year i find myself at a desk, washing an amoxicillin down with coke
why would you windows-1252 encode json the standard literally specifies utf-8 it's 10 pages and it's mostly pictures why couldn't you respect that why why whY
single-user instance for @firstname.lastname@example.org