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homeland proves i will watch absolutely anything with mandy patinkin in it. the more harried, the better

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"oh NO" I say through a mouthful of crust, "I ate your bread and now I guess I have to stay with you under the fairy mound for eternity, damn" while the Fairies refuse to make eye contact with me

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today i'm thinking i'll get incredibly mad, online, about 'pokémon', which i do believe are a species of rodent endemic to the japanese archipelago

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the average human swallows 7 bowls of soup in their sleep each year

both are true:
* hearing about bands from tiny desk concerts makes me an old
* moon hooch is fun youtu.be/5I14TK0ylDo

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i hate to be a grammar snob, but it should actually be "Fewer Miserables"

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y'all "crosspost" between mastodon and twitter, while i "crosspost" in the temple of the Lord

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Warning: Module ‘automatic-breathing.ko’ has failed to load! Your vendor strongly recommends this module be loaded, and may indicate tampering with your system. Switching to manual breathing. You are now manually breathing.

us pol 

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oh now i remember why i haven't listened to st vincent in such a long time — it's because i feel every single song on the album. terrible

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@ryan I have one in my barn (this is not a joke)

has anyone ever seen an "auger?" im convinced someone needed a simile one day and made them up

just casually saying "troika" a few pages later, because why not?

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the first chapter of the first Legends of the Galactic Heroes novel is dropping words like "suzerain" and i am not ready

i am not cool enough to pull off the "dick in one hand, phone in the other" urinal stance

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i'm returning to the woodwork. it's where i belong

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Reading is illegal and if you understand this post you’re committing a crime

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ladies, it’s finally 2018 and 👏 we’re 👏 re-stigmatizing 👏 terrorism

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un (c'est n'est pas une pipe)
deux (c'est n'est pas une pipe)
trois (c'est n'est pas une pipe)
quatre (c'est n'est pas une pipe)

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reblog this
if you have a bad brain
that don't think good

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hates.company

single-user instance for @ryan@hates.company